you could use the hybrid version:

>>> def printf(s, *args):
... print s % args
...
>>> Person.bar = lambda p: printf("foo") if p.fname > p.lname else printf("bar")
>>> john.bar()
bar


just stick printf into a common import file, and use it whenever you need to avoid statements

oh, and I thought you would like this:
Sales Guy vs. Web Dude
http://blip.tv/file/1015028
:)