Luke Maciak wrote:

Yeah, you would think that nerd community would be super inclusive, considering how many of us experienced exclusion, being ostracized or even bullied. But somehow we have took the exact wrong lessons from it, and concluded that because of those experiences and because we were traditionally viewed as undesirables we somehow can’t be misogynist or racist.

I recently joined an online dreadlocks community for the uk (like, the total opposite of the bunch of people that I’d be expected to ever associate with, but I’m one of these geeky people that doesn’t actually fit in very well with… geeky people) and I swear, they’re the nicest bunch of people I’ve ever met. I’ve got a calendar photo-shoot next month with them, and the month after, we’re going to a theme park. It was weird how welcoming they actually were. That and I’m actually getting to use my programming skills to write stuff that actually helps as well and they’re so thankful about it. It was just a mind-blowing experience finding people so welcoming after being shunned by even geeks.

Luke Maciak wrote:

Quick note: using the word female as a noun, unless referring to animals is considered a bit impolite if not sexist. It’s one of those language things that get ingrained in common speech patterns that I constantly make a conscious effort to correct. That’s the second part of the problem. You can be sexist without ever meaning to be – or worse, by consciously going out of your way not to be (see benevolent sexism and etc..). Which is why the community comes off as hostile as it does – many of us are socially awkward to begin with, and we often just don’t know any better.

The general rule of thumb is that female as an adjective is usually ok but should not be used as a noun. When in doubt it’s best to re-phrase sentence to use woman or women instead. Not that I have always followed this either – I’m pretty sure there is like a dozen of my posts on this blog where I talk about lack of “females in IT” or whatever. But I’m trying to be better at this.

Oh okay… I never heard that before. I used the word female to encompass both teenage girls and women – never knew it could be taken like that though (never had a lady ever mention it so… yeah… haha). I’ll keep it in mind though. Thanks Luke!

Yeah, you would think that nerd community would be super inclusive, considering how many of us experienced exclusion, being ostracized or even bullied. But somehow we have took the exact wrong lessons from it, and concluded that because of those experiences and because we were traditionally viewed as undesirables we somehow can’t be misogynist or racist.

Seriously, no one seems to fight harder to deny their privilege than white male cis-het nerds. I know because I am one, and I’m only now beginning to understand these issues.

TinyI wrote:

Can’t we just be happy that females want to give us the time of day and share the same interests as us?

Quick note: using the word female as a noun, unless referring to animals is considered a bit impolite if not sexist. It’s one of those language things that get ingrained in common speech patterns that I constantly make a conscious effort to correct. That’s the second part of the problem. You can be sexist without ever meaning to be – or worse, by consciously going out of your way not to be (see benevolent sexism and etc..). Which is why the community comes off as hostile as it does – many of us are socially awkward to begin with, and we often just don’t know any better.

The general rule of thumb is that female as an adjective is usually ok but should not be used as a noun. When in doubt it’s best to re-phrase sentence to use woman or women instead. Not that I have always followed this either – I’m pretty sure there is like a dozen of my posts on this blog where I talk about lack of “females in IT” or whatever. But I’m trying to be better at this.

Kind of sad that there needs to be a guide for women to navigate the world of geek…
Also kind of sad that there is this negativity towards women in the land of geek…
Also kind of sad that there is still negativity around Thor being turned into a lady.

Can’t we just be happy that females want to give us the time of day and share the same interests as us? Or is that just my thinking?