I Hate VBA

Someone please kill me. I just spent a whole day coding in VBA…

It is so mind bogglingly difficult to create a semi-robust vba macros that will not blow up when exposed to dumb users that it makes me want to puke. In case you never developed in VBA let me show you all the stages involved in working on a project involving this hellish language.

Cake Walk

Stage 1: Cakewalk

VBA? Pshh… It’s not even a real language. This is going to be a cake-walk.

Leave it to me Boss

Stage 2: Leave it to Me!

I looked at the spec, and this thing is going to be a walk in the park. Leave it to me boss! It will be ready in no time.

Harder Than Expected

Stage 3: This is Harder than I anticipated…

When I was starting this project, I did not realize that VBA is so ass-backwards retarded… It may actually take me some time before I figure out a way to properly implement this in a straightforward, easy and robust, user-proof way.

There has to be a way...

Stage 4: There has to be a way…

Hmm… There has to be a way to do this in VBA. I mean, how can you leave out an important feature like that. I just need to do more research on this…

WTF in Hell?

Stage 5: WTF in Hell????

WTF? Why is it doing that! I didn’t tell it to do that! This is stupid! Eat the food! Eat the FOOD! Gaaaah! What is wrong with this thing?

Must Kill!

Stage 6: Must… Kill… Something…

Fucking shit fuck fuck fucker fuck you aaaaagh!

ZOMG Deadline!

Stage 7: ZOMG! Deadline!

This is supposed to be due when? Oh crap! Crap! Crap! Fuck the hard stuff! I need to get some of this stuff done and quick!


Stage 8: Hax!

I have had enough of this. There is just no elegant way to do this. I’m just gonna have to to hack it into submission. But first, let me put on my gloves, cause it is going to get dirty…

So there – 8 stages of programming in VBA. I hope you enjoyed it, because my brain is to fried to think at this point.

Btw, all the images I used are from Fullmetal Alchemist anime and manga.

Also, if you are viewing this post via RSS feed or LJ syndication please note that the layout might be a little bit off. Just click on the link to view the original.

[tags]programming, vba, fullmetal alchemist, manga, anime[/tags]

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8 Responses to I Hate VBA

  1. ZeWrestler UNITED STATES Mozilla Firefox Windows says:

    hahaha. this doesn’t only apply to VBA. I’m going to have to convert this and have it apply to nachos. i’ll provide the link when i do it….(will be a couple of days because i have a deadline coming up.

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  2. Luke UNITED STATES Mozilla Firefox Windows says:

    Yeah, I guess it would apply to just about anything – especially the nachos thing. But hey, at least you get to work in C – the experience may come in handy one day. Coding in VBA on the other hand is just a slow torture that gets you nowhere. :P

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  3. Steve NEW ZEALAND Mozilla Firefox Windows says:

    hahaha man i’ve just spent 3 hours and i’ve written 2 lines of code

    VBA IS MIND BOGGLINGLY BAD. And just to kick you in the face Micro$hite has the most convoluted bloated help files that don’t actually tell you any thing anyway

    I need to MD5 email address on an access table. If I was using mysql all i’d need to do is write the sql “hash = md5(email)”. done in 2 seconds. but @#$!@#$!@#$ vba doesn’t even have an md5 function!?!?? Took me an hour just to find a fu@#$g md5 function which was originally written for asp (seriously if you still code in old school asp you need to be shot).


    but no every fuc@#$g time try to do anything with the database i get error message, after error message, after error message. every message is utterly useless giving no feedback.

    DROP TABLE _tmp (since my CREATE VIEW sql doesn’t work ???)

    yeah i know _tmp doesn’t exist i’m dropping it cos it might exist and you’ll spaz and error if i try creating it if it does exist

    fcuk try catch ?

    what no try catch, wtf is this shit??

    On Error goto catch
    ‘ code
    ‘ code
    ‘ code
    ‘ code
    ‘ wtf is this syntax, commodore 64 sh1t?????

    seriously 3 hours ive written 2 lines. VBA FCUKING SUCCCCCCCCKSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  4. sour THAILAND Mozilla Firefox Windows says:

    sorry i know this is an old thread but i just had to post something….

    ive spent all day validating a ONE date field, VBA is eye wateringly bad, and thats being very polite….. also Access 2007!?@?

    what kind of developer would use access to build a secure multi user data driven application?!!#!!

    also VBA – no multiline comments, id laugh if i didnt have to spend the next 2 weeks looking at this sh1t!


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  5. Rosdi MALAYSIA Mozilla Firefox Windows says:

    A friend ask me to do a simple macro in excel. It was less than 30 lines but I could not do it without utilizing GOTO statement. Figure that.

    I hate it, it is not even supposed to be released by microsuck. I swear I will never touch VBA again, ever!

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  6. alex UNITED STATES Google Chrome Windows says:

    Despite how old this post is it is particularly relevant to me today. Particularly #5. After wondering WTF!? After having part of a table write to the wrong area of the worksheet and checking my work, i commented out every line that wrote to the sheet. It still did it. I then deleted every line that wrote to the sheet. It still did it. Made sure to tell it to compile. It still did it.


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  7. Dave SWEDEN Internet Explorer Windows says:

    I’ve been coding in VBA for nearly a year since where I work, we use microsoft office a lot. My personal favourite language is Python but they won’t let me use it at work because I’m the only person who knows it.

    In general, I can do pretty much any datasmithing that I want with minimal hassle. Granted, it’s more difficult to code elegantly than in something such as Python and often ‘GoTos’ and copypasta coding is unavoidable, but so long as it works I can live with it. It’s prone to memory leaks because the garbage collection is appalling, but if you’re careful, it can be okay.

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  8. IK NORWAY Google Chrome Windows says:

    This was an old rant but still so relevant. After having spent 4 hours trying to make some simple automation of budget spreadsheets with macros I just had to find out if it was only me, or if other people hated vba as well. I know C by heart. I program a lot of python. I get perl and fortran. Even labview! But vba is f%¤#ing shite! What kind of error handling is this? And the IDE… Sometimes I just want to leave a line of code without finishing to look at something else, I don’t need a crappy POPUP to tell me it is not valid!

    Last time I even try using this shite.

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